May Your Chains Set Lightly Upon You

Use Your Club Card If You Want to Live

Is consumer advocate Clark Howard a shill for Big Brother? He said that when he signs up for the grocery store club cards; he uses a dead president’s name to throw the dogs off the scent. I agree with him. Although I’m not up to anything illegal; I have many aliases for conducting various anonymous business.

I think it was about twenty years ago when my local store introduced the club card. I asked for the card and quickly returned it when I saw all the personal questions on the application. They said the information was for store use only: demographics and marketing. I didn’t believe them. I couldn’t understand how their knowledge of everything about me made prices lower. I decided that my privacy was worth more than a few discounts.

It turns out that prices are often considerably better with the club card, and now every grocery store in my city had one. I knew there must be a conspiracy. I couldn’t figure it out, but I knew I didn’t want to be involved.

It was becoming harder to put food on the table. My city at the time didn’t have dollar stores or discount grocery stores. Prices steadily rose, unless you had the card. Why do they want us all in their clubs just so we can afford to eat? Now, I needed the club benefits, but not the membership.

OK there, Girly. Do you think we can get an honest count, or is that against the policy of the store? Wait. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait, Wait. Wait a minute. What's with the hit-and-run on the keys, there? What's with the holding hands? I oughta be able to hold more than that for what your'e charging in here!

One day someone ahead of me in line filled an application for the card. I noticed that the cashier didn’t ask for any identification and just took the application without even reading it and handed the customer a new card. A light bulb turned on in my head. I asked for an application and filled out all false information; and, just like that; I could once again buy groceries at reasonable prices.
I never hesitate to join the clubs today. I’ve never told anyone about my alias use, but I figured there would be some other people who would have figured out the trick. I was kind of shocked to hear Clark Howard talk about it on the radio today. I think it means Big Brother has finally figured it out too.

“Just because you’re paranoid; doesn’t mean they’re not after you.”  – Kurt Cobain

I’m not a paranoid conspiracy theorist. I believe every word of the Bible is the truth and the word of God. Because God made this world; I believe he knows what is going to happen to it. John of Patmos was told the future by an angel of God and  instructed to reveal the Apocalypse to us in the book of Revelations. Big Brother is coming. Revelations says that all men will be subject to the ruler of the new world order government. Now you can either do this the easy way or the hard way. They’re trying to get us to do it the easy way now. If we don’t submit willingly, then they will have to use force. Their usual persuasion tools are fear and, the children. How many times have you heard them ask you to do it for the children? They know you fear for children’s safety, and will do anything to protect them. You don’t have kids? So. Only an inhumane monster wouldn’t do it for the children. They love to appeal to your emotions: safety, security. Remember all the times they asked you to give up just a bit of liberty in exchange for safety? The FDA, DEA, BATF-E, national speed limit, helmet laws, Patriot Act, Department Homeland Security, TSA, NDAA?

Do you want to be safe? Do you want to get sick and die from food poisoning? No? Clark Howard said today that even though he used to use aliases for his club cards; he doesn’t anymore and he recommends that you don’t either. He said that the government uses the club card databases to track the origins of food-borne illnesses and for some reason; if we don’t all sign up for them with our real information; scientists, doctors, and the government won’t be able to do this anymore and we’ll all die from salmonella and e-coli…

I heard a story about a man who was paying the non-smoking rate for his health insurance. The insurance company told him they were changing him to the smoking rate because his club card records indicated that he had bought cigarettes. The totalitarianism is coming one little step at a time. They are going to slowly creep it up on you so you won’t see it coming. When the Affordable Care Act is in full effect; there will be less free, independent Americans. When the care of your very own personal body is under the domain of the federal government; they will be able to control and rule over every minute aspect of your life, and these club cards will be one of the tools used to do it.

I ask a question to the people who applied for club cards with their true identities. These past few years when certain food items became contaminated and killed people: strawberries, spinach, lemons, eggs, peanut butter, cantaloupes, et al; did the Center for Disease Control and Prevention or National Institute of Health call you and say that they were calling to warn you not to eat that food you recently bought?

I’m going to go ahead and call shenanigans on this one. I won’t be a sleepwalking sheep and fall for this lie. I remember food recalls happening long before the use of club cards. The CDC has tracked outbreaks since the ’70s. The CDC tracked a case of botulism in 1971 to the manufacturer from two victims; a man and his wife; without club cards.

Clark Howard, you are a prominent, trusted consumer advocate, but I’m not going to trust you this time. Jim White, I mean, “Rutherford B. Hayes” *-) will continue to buy his genetically modified, irradiated, high fructose corn syrup, codex compliant foodstuffs at a discounted price with his club card obtained surreptitiously. That is until they pass the laws outlawing alias use on the Internets and then apply those laws to the real world.

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3 responses

  1. Reblogged this on The Freedom Fighter.

    March 3, 2013 at 18:08

  2. I admit: I have been swayed by the global financial tin-foil-hat-wearers with regards to the economic climate. Has anybody identified any twinkling of optimism throughout this “dip”?

    January 19, 2012 at 09:53

  3. I admit… I’ve been convinced by the monetary doomsayers with regards to the market. Has anyone discovered any ray of hope in this “down-turn”?

    January 19, 2012 at 04:38

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